Co Dependant Relationship

Co-dependant Relationship

A Co-dependent Relationship is  an emotional and behavioral condition that affects an individual’s ability to have a healthy, mutually satisfying relationship.

Are you in a Co-dependant Relationship?
  • Are you unable to find satisfaction in your life outside of a specific person?
  • Do you want to continue in the relationship even if your partner is physically and mentally hurting you most of the time?
  • Do you feel compelled to make sacrifices to please your partner, but don’t get much in return?
  • Do you often ignore your own values and conscience in order to meet your partner’s needs? 
  • Does your partner, demand that you go against your conscience  and your needs?
  • Are you preoccupied with and worried about making your partner feel happy?
  • Do you recognize unhealthy behaviors in your partner but stay with him or her in spite of them?
  • Are you giving support to your partner at the cost of your own mental, emotional, and physical health?
  • Do you constantly have to take care to avoid triggering your partner’s bad mood?
  • Do you feel extreme anxiety about your relationship and how to maintain it?
  • Do you find that you have  little or no interests outside of your relationship?
  • Do you neglect your personal interests or values to keep your relationship with your your partner?
  • Do you feel guilty about expressing your own desires and needs to your partner?
If you answer “Yes” to more than two of the above questions you may be in a Co-dependant Relationship

Healthy Relationship: In a healthy relationship, both partners mutually bond with and rely on each other in a safe and appropriate way, and satisfy each other needs

Co-dependant Relationship: It is a relationship in which one partner, known as “the co-dependent person“, has an unhealthy need to be needed, and the other partner, known as “the enabler“,  exploits this need by making excessive demands on the codependant person.

A co-dependent relationship is an unhealthy and imbalanced pattern of behavior in which you find yourself dependent on approval from your partner for your self-worth and identity.

Co-dependant people have good intentions. They try to take care of a person who, they perceive,  is experiencing difficulty. They see the partner as a bird with a broken wing that they want to heal. They feel that they can make the person better. However, the caretaking becomes compulsive and defeating. A co-dependant relationship can result in a dysfunctional marriage.

The co-dependent person perceives self-worth and self-esteem based on the degree to which he/she is needed by the enabler.  The enabler gets satisfaction out of having their needs constantly fulfilled and  encourages the partner’s dependancy by fostering guilt. 

Co-dependent persons have low self-esteem and look for anything outside of themselves to make them feel better. They find it hard to be themselves.They often suffer from severe anxiety and may be depressed.  Some try to overcome their anxiety and depression through alcohol, drugs or nicotine – and become addicted.

Treatment involves psychotherapy and counselling. Medication may be required to treat anxiety and depression in order for the person to be able to think calmly and clearly through the therapy process.